While this column does not like to stray into on-Earth politics too much, we note that an attempt to ban full-body “Burqini” swimsuits from the beach by the Mayor of Cannes has now been overturned by a French court. And rightly so – assuming that those wearing them have not been coerced to do so.
Surprisingly, the full body swimsuits, dubbed Burqinis, and proposed new spacesuit designs are not so far apart. For the past ten years or so, designer Dava Newman has been working on elasticated spacesuits in a move away from the traditional bulky bellows-balloon spacesuit types. And they look remarkably like Burqinis.
The Biosuit design developed at Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) uses elasticated fabrics to provide the correct pressurisation protection. The result is that the suit looks nearly as “space age” as the original silver Mercury programme spacesuit. The full description is here.
Mind you, while the traditional space suit might well change into a more skin-tight ensemble, you always need a hard shiny helmet to keep the oxygen at your face. Assuming that they are not banned as well, they should be available on a planet near you soon!
Back on the subject of swimwear, whether on the beach or by the pool, while burqinis have the A-OK for now in France, under French law adult males at public swimming pools are still bizarrely, not allowed to wear swimming shorts. Instead they have to, somewhat upsettingly for this non-Adonis, wear very skimpy “speedo” style trunks instead. For the uninitiated, “speedos” are those trunks so minimally worn by the divers at this year’s Rio Olympics.
It is not for nothing that these skimpy trunks are nicknamed “Budgie Smugglers”! (That is “Perruche Contrebandiers” in French).
As such, until the swimming shorts ban is similarly overturned there, could anyone suggest where your correspondent could get a bigger budgie? (Plus grande perruche?)
Well either that, or a shiny space helmet (with a visor) just to hide his blushes.